Who cares?

Well this is it. 2 years. I had a hard time choosing a song to post today. I had several possibilities picked out but considering recent developments most of them weren't applicable anymore.

If you had asked me last week how I felt about today I would have invited you over to get drunk with me. I was feeling really depressed about hitting that 2 year mark with (what I felt was) nothing to show for it. How had I been single for 2 whole years? Why couldn't I just move on already?

And I mean it's not like I hadn't been trying.

All I knew up until now was that I really didn't want to still be single at 2 years. What a failure! And how embarrassing. I was definitely feeling anxious about it.

But God is good. He knows what we need before we even ask it. And His timing is perfect (though that is still a lesson I struggle with) and He will give us what we need when we need it.

I'm not saying this new relationship is super serious or anything, just that it came when it needed to. And it's new and exciting and I'm enjoying it and plan to continue to enjoy it for however long that is. All possibilities are open at this point and I'm not gonna worry about the future. I'm going to enjoy what I have for now.

Last night I told my friend that today would be the 2 year mark and he replied "so what? Who cares?" And he was right.

I don't care as much as I thought I would. And that's good.

2 Years

The hand of my clock strikes two
In times when I got the best of you
We made promises we couldn't keep
And every night we couldn't sleep.
I didn't know why, but didn't ask questions
because it was the first time in my life, yeah the first time in my life
Where I, did something right.

I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time
I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time

You pick me apart
While I search for witty things to say (In my defense)
"You'll never amount to anything anyway"
(Don't press your luck, don't press your luck)
And think that I'm impressed with your one night stands
and your contagious kiss
I'm trying to get this right
Yeah, cause I'm ridiculous like that

I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time
I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time

I'll keep this as
A constant reminder
Of the nights I spent holding onto her
And rest assured I'm moving on
I miss you less, with each day you're gone (you're gone)

I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time
I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time

Matchbook Romance - The Greatest Fall (of all time)

False Alarm

False alarm guys. False alarm.

Quote

When I look at you it feels like my body is smiling. -Mystery Team

I love my life

Sometimes I wish I could say everything that I think or feel.

But then I realize how ridiculous that sounds. People who say everything they think or feel can come across as selfish and self centered and immature.

I think everyone feels the same things we just all deal with them differently.

I think that if I said everything I was thinking no one would like me and I probably wouldn't have any friends.

So does that make me a better person because I know when to be silent? Or does it make me a worse person because I'm not being true to myself?

I think it takes tact to figure out when to speak your mind or when to stay silent. And I choose to believe that I am more mature because I don't make everything about me.

But I also believe I still have a lot more growing to do. No one is perfect and no one loves their lives 100% of the time. And that's ok. Stop complaining and do something to change it...or just stay silent.